How to make your actions match your desires
Paul Newton at Niagara Falls
Does your action truly match your desires?
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As humans we contradict our lives. We sometimes consciously and unconsciously deter ourselves from our desires. Other times we purposefully distract ourselves because we are scared of change, scared of our very own desires.
How do I know this? Because I am human and I witness it.
About 2 years ago when I newly immigrated to North America, I became friends with a lovely couple who took me to Niagara Falls. It was my first time visiting the falls. The feeling was surreal.
After this awesome experience, I spent the next two years building myself, learning from my culture shock, familiarizing with my weakness alongside strengthening my strengths. While going through this rigorous process, I desired a better future.
Paul Newton Throwback 2018 and 2020 at Niagara falls
Just over the weekend, I was able to take my family for a short vacation at Niagara falls, this time it was massively comfortable, enjoyable and memorable.
Through in-depth studies and researches I have made, I got to realize from the 5am club that our organs can be counter productive even though they are responsible for become more productive.
This awareness will unlock something inside of you.
Amygdala: one major cause of fear among others😯😯😯
The Amygdala is an almond-shaped mass of gray matter inside each cerebral hemisphere, involved with the experiencing of emotions. Its what causes us to either fight, flight or freeze whenever we come across a threat.
Your desires, your dreams they are threatening.
They look unbelievable because you haven’t actually attained it or witnessed anything like that before. Therefore, as social beings and as the world isn’t as nomadic as it was many years ago where we fight for territories, your amygdala picks on small trivial issues and expand them as Saber-tooth tiger.
You desire to loose weight but just after 2 days working on this goal, your amygdala gets scared of this new social change and boom triggers the fear of missing or loosing something. You go back to snacking late night🥓🥗🥪🌮🌯🍜
You want to build muscles, your amygdala, tells you, its impossible to attain such. You give up.😏
You want to start a business, your amygdala, shows you all the things that can go wrong when you start. How unqualified you are, how unprepared you are etc. You give up😑
Whatever you want to do, there are always 50000 million reasons and ways your amygdala will want to stop you.
But there is a way out😃
What to do.
1. Align your actions with your desires:
Do want a beautiful relationship? You have to prepare yourself to be that right person.
Do you want to loose weight? You have to work consistently on that goal.
Do you want to build muscles? You have to keep working out.
It is not what that matters, what matters is the how. You have to be tactical in facing your fears
This is where coaching comes in. How can you coach yourself to follow through your actions and achieve that desire you are hungry for?
Can you coach yourself or do you need a coach?
Who can coach you? (I am here hehe 😁)
You have to define what success is for yourself for you to become aggressive in following through.
2. Review your actions regularly: When using a GPS🗺, it regularly instruct you on where to make a turn in order for you to get to your destination without hiccups.
Same with our life, for you to review your actions, it means you have to be clear on where exactly you want to go and how you can get there. Do you have a life blueprint? If no, here is a mini way to go through such.
Set goals
Map out activities you need to follow through
Outline the resources you need
Be explicit about the outcomes you want
Review regularly
My mentor is hosting Top 25 in September for women. Its a program that allows you create the blueprint of your life for the next 25 years.
Register here: Registration form
3. Look for the gain in the pain: Tell me a life that’s free from pain. As objects have weight so is life full of pain. Its more painful to avoid pain but gainful to embrace the pain tactfully. That way you’ve trained yourself to be tough and never back down when foreign experiences or moments come your way.
There are many things your current situation is trying to teach you but are you paying attention?
4. Take ownership of your life: You have to realize that no one is more invested in your future as much as you should. You should not only desire the best but you must do all it takes to earn the future.
Stop blaming people for your very own mistakes and short comings. Its indeed a blessing in disguise if you choose to see it that way. Life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you.
Wrap up
I can go on and on listing how you can make your actions match your desires.
You have to train your mind, be intentional, be aware of how your actions influence your outcomes (desires). If not you are going to working against yourself.
Answer these questions honestly;
What have you been doing to counter yourself?
What can you do now to make a difference?
Let me know your thoughts in the comment section. Share this content to your loved ones.
